A Marriage that lasts – 5 things that make marriage work

Research shows that in the Western culture more than 90% of people had been or were married by age 50. Saying marriage is very popular is an understatement! Most of us do it at some point in our lives. Getting married is not the challenge, staying married is. So how can I make marriage work? Here are 5 key factors that help me to stay married:

Love Connection

1. Commit

Marriage is a covenant not a contract. Priority! If you don’t (want to) pass this one, forget about the other 4. If you have already failed this one, then remember that pivotal to covenant in the Bible is the word ‘Grace’!

Make Marriage Work

2. Learn to Listen, Learn to Share

Really hearing each other’s hearts is hard and heart work. It takes time and focus, especially in our current technological age and 24 hour economies.


3. Admit you are not an expert

Be teachable: humble enough to recognize there is always more to learn. Phil. 3:12 . Even after several years in ministry, books and workshops, I have to admit that I am not an expert. There is still more to discover.

Research and investigate

4. Create memories together

See life as an adventure that you write together, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health… You only have one shot at this! Don’t settle for mediocre and especially, don’t give up.


5. A hot wife and a sexy husband

Positive communication, giving compliments, and an attitude of gratitude or both like water to dry soil. So when I feel like I am not getting enough ‘attention’, I check back with myself and start looking at my words.

Positive communication leads to warmer affection

Make Marriage Work

Now it is your turn! These were some of the things that help me, even today. But I’m curious and always ready to learn: so…

What are you applying that makes your no. 1 relationship work well?

[updated post from May 2016]